Apr 7, 2009

The impulse to leave everything behind.

Sometimes I get this impulse to set everything on fire (figuratively--definitely not literally) and walk away from my life completely. I just want to go someplace new and start all over again, watch my life take shape in a place where no one knows me, where no one has any preconceived notions about me or pre-existing judgment. Someplace where I have complete freedom to be myself, do whatever I want, and ignore all the rules we're told to follow.

I know this impulse comes from the fact that I want to stop following all the rules but am too afraid to. I think somehow that if I can get away from my current life, maybe the rules will matter less. If I'm not the same person anymore, maybe I won't care. I know that's not true, but that's still the impulse.

Do you ever feel like this? Do you ever wish you could just walk out on your life and start somewhere completely new, as a completely new person?

65 comments:

  1. every. single. day. i feel trapped about ... 6/7 days of the week.

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  2. i think the mark of a good friend is that they're still your friend even if you change and/or decide to break all the rules.

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  3. How come you actually are able to write what I really feel for the past few years? I feel completely trapped. And completely unhappy.

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  4. Absolutely! All the freaking time. Things just get too stressful or the days just start rolling in together and nothing is exciting. Thats when I wish I could just pick up everything, move far far away and do something completely for myself for once in my life. Then I think about bills and family and friends...and here I am still. haha its sad but true. Just know that you aren't alone in this!

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  5. Well, I kinda think I did...though Dallas wasn't a very far move, I didn't really know anyone here and I had to make all new friends and struggle through a job and apartment change only a year and a half after I arrived. Sometimes I'm grateful for the ability to break some of my old habits and really define myself as something new, and sometimes I fear that this new place (that I don't particularly like) is having more of an effect on me than I would like - that I'm actually changing in a negative direction because of it.

    Though, it's interesting that you say this is something you would like to do because I think you did it! And twice already, really. I think that your life as a flight attendant and now your current life are two examples where you got a whole new start (maybe with a few familiar elements)...so what has it done for you?

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  6. "Sometimes I'm grateful for the ability to break some of my old habits and really define myself as something new, and sometimes I fear that this new place (that I don't particularly like) is having more of an effect on me than I would like - that I'm actually changing in a negative direction because of it."

    Hear, hear. And sometimes I have to remind myself that I've done PLENTY of the whole "let me do something ridiculous and completely change my life over night" thing. It IS pretty exciting, but...I don't know. I feel like for all the running I've done, I either haven't been able to make a clean enough break or I haven't been totally satisfied with the outcome. I feel like I'm looking for something and as soon as I get close to it, it takes off in a different direction. =\ Blah.

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  7. Life.....far out man.

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  8. That was my big dream in highschool. And now, planning on transferring to my 3rd different university in 3 years, I think on some level that by changing schools and encounting new people, that I will become a new person myself. But, if things continue the way they have, I just have to accept that even if I could start a new life, I am still shy and awkward, and people see that pretty quickly.

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  9. Shy and awkward...same here. :)

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  10. I'm adding to the agreement here...

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  11. I am a person that has few ties.

    My family was always transient (military) and I grew up thinking that something better is just around the corner. You know what?

    Sometimes it isn't "better" but the good news is it is ALWAYS different. And different in its own right "good."

    Because of my upbringing, I have a HUGE appreciation for people’s diversity and I enjoy learning about new people. My favorite group of friends is my Somali clients I represent as a lobbyist. I love their food! (and they eat from a common bowl...hummmmm....)

    I can't image not being able to pick up stakes at anytime and just saying! "Bye!"

    It makes you feel self-reliant and confident and self sufficient.

    Maybe you should try a mini-escape, explore a new sanctuary, and feather a new nest. What can it hurt? At least it will be "different" :) and you will always be able to come home after your adventure! (I can recommend Leavenworth, Washington! LOL!!!!!!!)

    Diony7
    Twitter

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  12. For the last 10 years I've been creating and recreating my life over and over again. Everytime I do it it gets better in some way; I take something from the experience that makes me feel more in tune with me and more aware of whats important. I read a quote recently somewhere 'leap and the net will appear.' I've been starting starting to really dislike my job over the past few weeks. I made the decision to cast fortune to the wind and take a new direction. Within hours of telling my boss that I was quitting (I have an otherwise excellent job with great pay, mostly good people, but its never sat quite right) I had a contract lined up doing what I love where I would have made enough cash in 2 weeks to pay for my next 2 months of job-work. I hesitated, and let everyone talk me out of it (they got scared that I was going to show them how easy it is to follow your heart and it would have made all of them dissatisfied until they did the same). I accepted the pay rise to stay with the company and told my client the story, even he said it was a good idea to stay. Within minutes of saying yes to the renegotiated pay offer, stuff started going wrong. First my plane was delayed by 2 hours, my car was in the long term parking but I found had lost my ticket, then I found i had a flat tyre, then a flat battery! And it started raining! The opportunity passed me by because I hesitated. Now I'm sitting here like a schmuck, with my first head cold in a year, and a bunch of work to do before I fly back to work again early tomorrow morning. The only good thing is, that I know I won't be making the same mistake twice!!!

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  13. Hi.
    I am 52. I have done just this on numerous occasions. Let me give you the benefit of my experience. It always seems like a good idea to give it all up and start over. Unfortunately, the problems you are leaving behind follow you. They are created by you, and they are in essence you. All you are usually doing is setting yourself back financially, and committing to much loneliness. You miss having friends so you go out and find some... Where you find them is irrelevant, it is how you attract them that is what matters and you have a tendency to do it the same way you attracted friends before. This pretty much puts you back into the same situation you were in when you left.

    There are many good reasons to relocate. But I have never done so because of any of them. I found this thread because I am thinking about doing this all over again.... I just really don't think I have the energy. I will try to fix the problems without running away this time.

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  14. Why don't you just get up and leave..... no one is stopping you but yourself! stop living life for other people If you're not happy yourself then you cant make the people around you happy. You're young and you need to take a vacation and experience something new.....something different!

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  15. i'd LOVE to get up and leave! - i use to do it when i was younger - end relationships, friendships, and so forth and start a new - then i "grew-up" have a house, car, friends, boyfriend, bills and well i wanna do it again! - so this time PEACE CORP! .. it's not so permamant i guess - people aren't too happy about it - but it'll be my last whorah, ya know?! .. i hope u get the change to just GET UP AND LEAVE and START NEW!

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  16. I laugh because I feel the same way every day. I've made several changes during my late-teens and early 20s including transferring to a different college, moving home from college, leaving jobs, enrolling and dropping out of a graduate program, and most recently, moving out of my parents home in the 'burbs for the first time and into a city all by myself.

    Like a previous commentor pointed out, ultimately, I have been and still am running away from myself. Where I go may change, but what happens in each place does not, because I being the problem, am always right here.

    I'm 24, and I am still trying to figure it all out. I hope one day I am able.

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  17. I don't know where this feeling came from. I just woke up today and can't stop thinking about it! I am 25, married and live in San Francisco. I feel like just leaving everything behind but my husband and cats and just going. I just want to drive and stop in every town. See this country and not have a care in this world. I want to just start over fresh somewhere where people are genuine. Where people care about making friends and not what they have. I think that the midwest would be a great place to go. I really need to think hard about this.

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  18. This feeling of being trapped is beginning to feel like I am dying without dignity. Continuing on like this is slowly becoming a passive form of acceptance; something I do not want! The thing about being trapped is that money also plays an instrumental role in hindering the sought after change...

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  19. I am planning on doing just this. This is my last summer at home, most things are planned, only a couple more things to do now. I am not telling anyone because i tried telling my friends and family how i felt before and they didnt want to know, or just didnt believe i'd ever get there? i dont know. Im 20, have saved as much as i possibly can from my full time job, in cash (cant be traced), have got rid of my contract phone and gone back to pay as you go. visa's are all in place and absolutley no one knows (its best that way).

    Im nervous but thought i'd be a lot more scared but im really not. Im so excited and happy about this. Its what ive wanted for as long as i can remember. since i was a little girl i wanted to move away and travel the world and do all theses amazing things. I love my family dearly, however they are very disfunctional and very big and im ashamed to say have a slight reputation as being loud, drunk, agressive, rude and untrustworthy. I hate this!!! its really not me.

    I have written a letter to my famiy and few good friends for when i leave. I really hope they dont try to look for me. they have pushed me away my whole life (involuntarily but still fail to see the error of their ways) and chasing after me will only push me away even further.

    I wish anyone all the best for their plans in the future :)
    I myself cannot wait for mine! its time for me to start living my own life!!

    good luck people x

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  20. Hi everybody!
    It's good seeing that I'm not alone in this. Like all of you, I just want to get away! Hell, I want to wake up every day without having to rely on anybody but myself! I want to wake up not knowing what the day is going to bring! Not like the everyday routine where you always know that even though you can live something new for three or four hours(like when you go out) after you come back is going to be the same old sh*t. I want to experience the thrills of an unpredictable and spontaneous lifestyle, meet tons of new people, and enjoy that beautiful world that lays outside my window waiting for me to explore it.
    I have wanted to do this for quite a while now, even though the feeling is like a flow: sometimes it gets stronger, sometimes weaker, but it has always been there. I remember one day I was hanging out with a friend and I had a debit card I had just gotten from my College's Financial Aid. I told him: man, I would love to go crazy right now; I would just go away and be in New York by tomorrow!
    I'm going to do just like the girl that posted before me, and start saving and planning my move! This has very little to do with my family: they all love me a lot and support me, but they're putting too much pressure on me(trying to help me, I don't doubt it) instead of trying to understand me.
    THE WORLD IS WAITING FOR ME!

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  21. Have just done this. Thrown or given away everything I have accumulated and known for the past 25 years to pick up with a few clothes in a back pack and a ticket in my pocket. Just spent the last $2 I have on a bottle of water in the airport and sat down at free internet and decided to google "leave everything behind"

    In 40ish hours i will have gone from Sydney Australia to the middle of Germany (I dont know any german) and will see what happens next...

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  22. "Feeling impulsive and wanting to leave everything behind"
    I just typed these words into the Google search engine and stumbled across this blog. For as long as I can remember I've felt like I'm at war with myself. Unlike others I don't feel like I have a calling in life... other than to get out into the world and experience life in purest yet rarest form! Which can only be satisfied by leaving it all and then seeing it all... I just want to be me, but the "me" who is alive!

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  23. hi people , im planning to leave everything behind me and just leave to follow my dream, but im still underage and my famiy says that i dream big and i will never make my dream come true. Did you ever get that feeling that your gonna make it? I've got that feeling and i hope i will make it. reading what other people said in here makes me believe more.

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  24. After reading a lot of these comments I started to realize these people know what I'm talking about... I've already moved once for a better job unfortunately the job and this place suck and its not just the job itself it the people and what I'm what doing I don't feel right about any of it. My brother picked up and left to travel a few months ago and he has shown me that it's not that hard to do now I'm actively seeking employment in other countries I figure all the planning is a waste of time if I can at least do something I'm interested in and get to travel at the same time "I'm in" so I guess we'll see what happens I'm very excited and nervous all at once

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  25. For past 1.5 years my life turned to hell, it started from mean boos and mean collegues,from where I had to leave becasue couldn't stand it anymore, after I had a huge fight with my family,and had to live with them in one house and take all the abuse from them 6 months,because I was jobless I couldn't move out, from the family that was always there for me before this fight, eventually I earned severe depression with anxiety and panic attacks and was jobless for 1 year.After somehow I got a job and company went bankrupt in 6 months, after that I started to have a lot of problems with my boyfriend who was always amazing person for last 4 years, I'm still unemployed for 3 months, I had 2 very close friends and both of them got in fight with me, and I was with them best friend for my whole life, today I felt that it's even somebody's curse, even though I don't beleive in these kind of staff. But what else can it be? Only bad luck is following me for these 1.5 years. And the more I'm waiting the more my life is becoming worse, right now it's my dream to leave everything behind and start a new life but since I'm jobless and don't have enough money I don't know how I can do it. If I would win at least $30000 in lottery, my family, friends and my boyfriend would never see me again.I would move as fas as to Avstralia and never comeback again.

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  26. My daughters 13 and im 30 as soon I see her off on her own im going to leave my $100,000 a yr job and 16 years working for the gov towards my retirement in the dust. I don't belong here most of us on this forum don't belong where you are we've just settled. Although money is only kinda important most people have to have it to be happy. money is a man made blinder. If you truly want to be happy then live for yourself and follow your heart, don't live for them.

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  27. I want to "up and leave" so bad. My life isn't terrible i just feel miserable most of the time! It's always a surprise to people if i am in a good mood at work or at home. I want to travel, meet new people, be able to see how people live differently. This site is good it allows everyone to see several people feel this way. However, someone needs to post a link or explain exactly what they did and how - just to give people something to fall back on.

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  28. I'm glad to see i'm not the only 1 with this feeling, i'm not sad or have a bad life, to the contrary i have a beautiful wife and son. It's just i think about my life and the life i want to give them so much it make me feel like just packing up my stuff and leave everything behind for a acting career, this burning sensation inside me is so strong i can feel the hot tears rolling down my face as i'm busy typing this. Its only my sense of responsibility that's stopping me from actually doing it. How can something that i feel so strong in my body be wrong, it feels like i'm tied with chains and want 2 break free!!!! thanx for this block to allow me to share my feelings.

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  29. I am 19 (turning 20 in a few days) and currently in college, but I can't take it anymore. I never even wanted to study, I just did it because it was expected of me. I've always done what's expected of me and even then I haven't been able to get too far or make anyone proud. I'm not going anywhere with this life, who am I kidding? If I stay here everything will only get worse. So I'm gonna leave. I just decided this. I decided it and typed it on google and this blog came up. I am going to start saving up money, I have around 500$ and I can't do shit with those but if I keep saving up I'll have enough to get out of here. I don't know where I'm going or what I'm gonna do but I have to go.

    Also to everyone who commented before me, good luck guys. We gotta support each other in things like these, because quite frankly no one else is going to understand us.

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  30. It's kind of inspiring to know that there are others out there that feel the same way as I do. I just need to get away from everyone in my life and start over. A person can only take so much emotional pain before they crack up and before that happens, I'm going to leave. I don't really know how I'm going to go about this, but i want to lose contact with everyone for at least 6 months. I just wanna be happy. I need to rid myself of all the poisionous people in my life and LIVE for once. Good luck to everyone.

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  31. This is the best thing I have ever googled. I also decide today that I am going to leave without telling anyone. I'm gonna start by going to work in a Kibbutz in Israel and from there I'll see where the wind takes me. I'm done with society telling us we need to go to school, to go to University to get a good job to marry, to have children to let let them get a good education and then to DIE. Well that's not me. From now on I'm going to LIVE. Thanks for all the comments. You are all an inspiration.

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  32. Smoke some pot, that will help temporarily

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  33. I smoke pot, and it did only help temporarily. I just want to run away and start a new life somewhere. I dislike the concept of money. It really grinds my gears. I am 20 years old from scotland and I really hate it here. At school I was fine, very good at sport, art music but not so much academically. I've felt like running away for along time but I live on a fucking island which means I need money to leave. WHY do I need to get a degree, I'm doing sports coaching, but through my eyes who the fuck wants to be a sports coach. This summer I will leave, I should have enough money by then to get myself off this hell hole of an island.

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  34. The most exciting part about taking what you can carry and leaving to an unfamiliar country is that you're completely lost. you don't know where to go or what to do. I've wanted to leave for so long but I worry that once I leave I can never come back. I want to leave everything behind, but I don't want to feel like im on the run. As much as i've wanted to leave, I feel that if I did leave I would quickly run out of my savings, and put myself in a very bad "survival" type position which would probably have me end up on the wrong side of the law. Still, there's something so appealing about leaving, telling nobody where you are going, and having to figure things out on your own and looking after yourself only. If I ever get to the point where I think I could leave and sustain living expenses (whereever I am) I would leave to somewhere remote in asia or south america.
    Good luck to everybody.

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  35. so im leaving next week, iv not told many people, especially those really close to me cos i know they wont want me to leave, n ther will be arguments n fights and i dont want that. Im planning on camping a lot and hostels when i need to. So excited, feels like im about to start a new life. Gonna miss everyone and thing here but its time i follow my dreams!

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  36. ^ best of luck. when things get tough (usually financially) remember the reasons you left in the first place. and remember that unless you're a millionaire, travelling aint gonna be easy. just appreciate the little things. Enjoy! I wish I had the courage you have! :)

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    1. ^^^^^^^^ just wanted to say 1st thats gud advice up there....loved reading all the comment made me feel like i'm not crazy n somehow someway i got to get away from here and at least see if its different out there.

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  37. I have been feeling like this since I was around 14 years old. Now 21, with two cats, and a boyfriend of 3 years, my first boyfriend. I've never felt so tied down. We have spoken of separating since we got together, because naturally we defend and critique damn near everything about each other. We are so in love, but I'm feeling that I cannot imagine going thru raising a child with him, forever tieing us and I can only imagine the difficulty for us even though we would be excellent parents. We are both strong and extremely loving people. Being Empaths we can barely hold it together when one is in a tough spot and the pain I feel from not fully communicating my constant feelings of unhappiness, is eating me up. we have a "perfect" life, everyone loves us as a couple, but I am torn. And we both love our cats sooo much... now what..

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    1. ^^^^^^^^^ Keep grinding. If you want it to get better, it will. Just take every day as it comes, don't think about the future, just live life. Stay open minded. Remember, the most important part of a relationship is communication. So talk to your boyfriend. I am sure he will be very understanding. He loves you, and anybody that is in love is willing to do WHATEVER it takes to make things work.
      Even thinking about a child at this point is probably not the best idea. Children dont bring people together, they dont fix problems that were already there.
      To me it sounds like you want the relationship to grow, and keep growing. You say you've wanted to pick up everything and leave with no destination since you were 14, so DO IT. If its really something you want to do, talk to your bf about it and get him on board. Go travel, explore, see the world, challenge yourself, become lost, find your way. Now imagine experiencing all that fear, excitment and happyness with the one you love.
      You are lucky. Most of us are alone and lonely.

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  38. Wow, so glad I found this blog. Thanks Google!

    I've always felt like I was meant to do something, although I have no clues as to what that is..the feeling has been getting more intense as the days go on. I'll be 23 this year and I feel like I haven't done anything to experience life. I don't want the same thing as my parents, even tho stability is nice and all..I just feel like I'd be missing out on so much if I just got a degree and a 9 to 5 career. Who really wants that anyways? Hmm..

    I just got out of a long term relationship(5 years). And I feel like this is my chance to actually get the hell out of here and find myself. Maybe Oregon or Montana.. the only thing stopping me is money, and I hate that fact. Money is definitely not something I care for too much...I just don't know how i can leave and be okay without it. I suppose it would t matter if I had found myself and my happiness. Hopefully I figure this out soon, time seems to only pass by faster and faster with every day.

    I have an idea, why don't we join together and defeat the system together? Ha. A man can dream..

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  39. I think about this constantly..especially when im alone (which is most of the time) or when im in the shower.Im 19, Im married, My husband of one year is in the Marines. I recently moved to Escondido CA. I am not happy. I thought it would get better by coming here. The first year I lived in Yuma AZ with his mom while he worked in cali and visited me every week. Anywho, I feel like I am settling for less. I deserve to be happy and life only comes around once. I dont want to settle. I want to start fresh somewhere. I am not happy with my husband, and i doubt that he is. We fight constantly, he has cheated on me numerous of times, and i think this relationship is an attachment, a soul tie. I love him, but i think it is time to walk away. Advice please?

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    1. YellowBrickRoadMay 8, 2012 at 7:37 AM

      I believe that many people on this post are just lonely. maybe they have never been in love or had someone care about them, or maybe it is for other reasons. But sometimes lonely people run away hoping they will find comfort in their independance in an unknown land far away from the hurtful experiences they have been put through. This is why many people play video games, this is why many people take drugs, and this is why people like me (and many people on this page) "run away" quite litterally, to another state, another country, and metaphorically another world.
      Nobdy can make a better decision than yourself. You know how you feel. You're not happy. He's not happy. Leave? It's as simple as that. If you can't bring yourself to leave, ask yourself why? Then go from there...

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    2. Thank you for this 'YellowBrickRoad'
      I think this is exactly what's causing me to feel like running away.

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  40. how do i follow your blog? i also have a blog. i want to connect

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  41. I think a majority of those who posted here are running away from something. I have a tendency to avoid issues and "run away" from them, but this time I don't have anything to run away from. My yearning to leave everything behind really stems from a "there's something more" for me elsewhere.

    I have outgrown my city and the people, I know the city too well... my city and I have nothing left to give each other. The only reason to stay would be for my family, but they will understand that it's time for me to grow up.

    I am keeping my goal a secret, but I am working two jobs to save enough money to leave before December 31st, 2013. San Diego/San Francisco... here I come.

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  42. I daydream about leaving it all too. You know that feeling you get when you step in your front door, that "I'm home feeling?"
    I havent felt that in a very long time, I dont fit in my own life as it is now. The real challenge for me is leaving my family and friends I have in this town, I love them all so much! But I still feel like they can never quite understand the depts of me.. I'm lonely even though surrounded with people I care about.

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  43. I'm 25 now & starting to get the urge to get up & leave everything... with a clear head.

    During my upbringing a lot of bad stuff happened, I always had other people attending to things, no one's that gave one... not family, never had one except a estranged brother who's disowned me.

    It's not that I do bad, terrible or unforgivable things, I am just... there & do daft stuff...

    When I was 18 I decided to move into a popular city, not on my own but with support... I was about to just up & leave on my own prior to that decision but was talked out of it by the support I mentioned.

    When I arrived I began living life, trying to get to know people, work, do things but for 7 years it seems Ive left scars, made catastrophic errors of judgement, embarrassed myself publicly & privately to a point where I now want to just go, more for other peoples benefit than my own, but also for me. I have faced my problems for 7 years, lost self confidence doing so but tried again and again for 7 long years to change, put things right & start over.

    Now to a point where I want an opportunity to go not one where I just selfishly go but where there is no other option but to go. Try until the bitter end type thing, get up, randomly buy a rucksack, tent, sleeping bag & just go...

    Travel somewhere, anywhere & get away to start again.

    The friends I thought I had aren't actually friends, I tried to put the past 7 years behind, start again with people, apologize, change, be different but it seems they aren't like minded, I tried changing too much, too soon then I crashed & burned out...

    It is me I accept but now it's just me, what better time to leave and go?

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  44. I feel like I need to move out of the city. I am afraid that the grass is not greener on the other side :(

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  45. Wow... I can't believe I came across this. It is wonderful. I literally looked up "How to leave everyone behind" on google and this is what came up.

    The reason is because your blog entry describes exactly what I'm doing. I feel the need to do this, and I'm only 19.

    I don't really have any family problems, or job problems. I started planning this months ago when I was in a rough spot, but now I'm not anymore. Or am I?

    I need to make a change, and in order to do that I need to meet people that don't know me at all. This makes sense. If only there was one person here who didn't have preconceived notions about me. I wish.

    Even the one person I thought didn't...does.

    Thanks for the clarification as to what I'm doing though. It seriously helps my train of thought. We all know we get this way sometimes. The question is whether we need to act on it or not.

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  46. great stuff this blog is, i am a 19yo sentenced to a 3 years prison and i am planning to run away from that style of life, to another country far away, have cash only to survive one month or so.

    shit happened very early and i changed my mind a lot from then to now on, actually i am really nice and stuff but drugs aren`t allowed lol. i got everything to gain and to lose... a family ofcourse-heart in particular-

    Fortune favours the bold. Braveheart and luck are linked to eachother so good luck people!

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  47. At 26, got a stable job, stable relationship, stable everything, but i feel like it's all being decided for me, like my opinion, wants & needs mean nothing anymore, I'm just working to some one else's predetermined plan. I have this need to pay off every thing i owe, set my girlfriend up so that she will not need anything from anyone & fall off the map, only leaving contact details with a few selected individuals that i feel i can trust.

    Start somewhere else & just make new relations, decisions & just generally do only what I want to do, i don't want to hurt anyone but this is my life & im not sure why im living it to please so many people but in no way please myself.

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  48. I came on this and read nearly every response. I'm 19, got a pretty good life, no family issues, currently in the first year at a great university. However over the last few years this idea has been creeping up on me more and more, and I'm not really sure why.

    Maybe it's the fact I don't want to do what everyone else does, and do it the same way as people have been doing for decades. Maybe it's that I need to know what the best way to live my life would be and to do that I need to go and find out these different ways. I think i'll do Europe and then find the cheapest way to get to the states and see where that takes me.

    You only have one life on this planet so why waste it by living the same life as everyone else?

    For everyone else here that hasn't seen it yet, I can't recommend 'Into the wild' highly enough. I can see similarities with both my own situation and many others here.

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    1. I somewhat agree with you there on into the wild, but for me it was the most inspirational and empowering thing ive ever seen, although there are thousands of people uot there wanting the life of freedom and no rules that wasn't the only reason Chris Mccandless did what he did, he was after complete spiritual revilation to find himself and to prove that life today is all smoke and mirrors, we don't need money nor a career or any of that other shit society thinks we need to survive. All we need is ourselves.

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  49. This blog is awesome. I'm 20 years old living in Minnesota and there is nothing I want more than to just leave this place! It is incredibly dull here. I went to a university for 2 years, decided I hated it, moved to an urban area (thinking i'd like it more) and currently go to a community college.

    The truth is, I'm just not interested in living the middle-class lifestyle that my parents live. I just want to live free and feel alive. Plus, the US isn't doing so well right now and things are probably going to get worse with the economy and all of the threats against us. I would give anything to get up and move to a new country, but bills get in the way. Everything is all about money these days, I can't stand it. Money is just a number, it shouldn't really matter. People are so blind.

    Just trying to keep it real. Keep calm and smoke weed! Maybe an opportunity will pop out of no where and I'll be able to finally move. In the meantime, I'll try to find some way to save money to get out of here!

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  50. I feel this way too. Not sure where it stems from, but its been nagging me lately.
    I find myself not into my old habits, lost site of my dream, really looking at the people I hangout with.
    Just thinking of doing an entire overhaul of my life.
    Am I really happy? Or just contempt?....

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  51. Listen to the previous poster, your life will not change much if you are currently unhappy. You have start to dream that somewhere else is utopia and void of problems. Make a list of the things that are troubling you and then spend time trying to figure out how to solve them. Pretend your friend is asking for your advice, spend time brainstroming how to solve each issue. Chances are if you spend the time and effort to solve the issues you won't want to move. If you still feeling like moving after you succeeded then go ahead because you will be happy either way.Moving because you hate the climate is one thing, moving to solve your problems usually doesnt work out.

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  53. I have a physical disability. I was born with a spinal tumor and have very limited movement from my neck down. Things were pretty good for me as a kid. I had a lot of encouragement from many different people to follow my dreams and I was always told I would succeed. I wanted to get into software engineering, and that's still my goal. But as the years went on, and especially when I turned 16, everything started to change. Life was slowing down, and people weren't as willing to help me, and I was becoming physically weaker. A lot more obstacles started to pop up too, and it was harder to find solutions. Anywhere I looked for help or answers it seemed like I was stuck on my own having to deal with many things. I was realizing that people with disabilities aren't really given the same opportunities. I started to just let go of things and try and accept my current situation and limitations. But Life wasn't life anymore. It was just surviving... When I turned 20 I realized I wasn't happy anymore. I wasn't getting the opportunity to just enjoy the small things in life that put I smile on your face, or even reach those milestones in life that motivate you to keep moving, and people (including my family) weren't understanding the hardships in my life, or not seeing who I was becoming as I grew up ... I'm 22 now, still with no job, never dated anyone, and there are no expectations of me. I live in my own apartment, and day after day I sit on my computer trying to figure out how to shape the direction of my life . I want to move ahead, but I don't have the money to pay for the care I need, or anything else for that matter. Although I am a fighter and I'm not willing to give up just yet. However I wish I could walk away and go somewhere far, where no one knows me. Everyone around me already has preconceived ideas about who I am, and what my life should be like with my disability. I think they don't see the real me that I've become. People see the wheelchair more often. It would be nice to start fresh, fix my mistakes, and just change who I am. I need to clear my head and release all these built up emotions... My goal is to study in Australia (might be a far fetched idea). Even if I make it there and things go horribly wrong, I would just be happy that I actually achieved something that people never thought I could...

    You can read more about me: michaeldzura.com/WordPress/

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  54. Thanks a lot for sharing this with all folks you really recognise what you are talking about! In this complex environment business need to present there company data in meaningful way.Sqiar (http://www.sqiar.com/solutions/technology/tableau/) which is in UK,provide services like Tableau and Data Warehousing etc .In these services sqiar experts convert company data into meaningful way.

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  55. I think the mistake people make when deciding to do something like this is letting money family and friends get in the way of it, if you have debts and what not as much as I despise myself for saying this money has to come first as debts don't pay themselves but once the debt is gone money should no longer be an issue as money is nothing but and object. Although you may need it for food, petrol etc, its still means nothing. The more money you have the more things you have t worry about. I used to have enough money to get me some food petrol and weed. I was happier than ever. Never let anything get in the way of you being happy and as for your friends and family, if theyre true they'll support you with any decision you make. If you ever want something in life reach out and grab it. Don't let the view of society or someone else influence your decisions or the human being you are.

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  56. This is a great blog here. Everyone, I'm so happy and encouraged to see all these experiences being thought and acted upon.

    I've left all once, ended up in Europe for two months. Then came back to the rut of life and work. Once again, just today, I've quit, and I'll be in Egypt and Jordan next week. When I come back, I hope I can have the energy and willingness to try something new and better.

    I just want to go and live in the mountains, contribute to society, and be at peace.

    Good luck everyone. Take life by the horns.

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  57. for 2 years already i feel like this, i am 21 years old and at college, but i feel this life is so wrong. why all people life the same life? married, work as long as they life, and die? did human just born to work at some insignificant company or job all they life just to earn money for food?

    i really want to leave all this behind and start travel, but when i remember my mother, i doesn't want to make her sad, the only biggest chain that tie me down now.

    i think i just gonna life normally for now, earn more experience and money and skill, until the time i can be free arrive

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  58. I feel the same way as so many people here. The problem is ive messed up so many times already that I feel like im going to just keep screwing up my life. I feel so much pressure from so many outside sources. I feel so much obligation. I know how much it would be a slap in the face for some people. I just want to make a selfish decision. One that is just for me with no one else's opinions in my brain. I feel cloudy up there with all of these feelings and opinions looming over me. An opportunity has popped up in my life and I think im going to take it. These comments have realky encouraged me not to give two fucksabout what other people think when in comes to my life and my decisions. They are mine, and mine solely.

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  59. every day is like that for me but i wanted to start small so i sugested changing school but everyone just said it was a bad idea and that i should stay but i have this feeling like i just want to get away from it all and finaly be me for once some time i wonder why i stay why i dont just get up say "screw this" and leave its what will make me happy so why cant i leave i just dont know but i feel like i just have to do it maybe not now but soon definitly soon.

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  60. Hi i am from south east asia sg a sunny island, well i felt suppressed for like as long as my primary school. After national service i felt tied to my college school and family & friends i love them all a lot. But just recently, for the past few months i just really got a urges to just up and go(not that it possible) perhap is just wanting to go travel? Or am i just thinking too much. Well i haven been the best student that why i felt kinda stress and overall i want to cut down my weight and stuff. Sometime i felt that a lots of stuff i am just doing for others expectation of me. In which i often screw up a lot. I just dun hav the courage to be selfish for once.

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